Augustus writes many poems. Many of them are better appreciated when he performs them, but here are a couple to demonstrate the sort of thing he does.
Bath time
I
Fresh out the bubble path
Clean as a daisy
I smell of apple and juniper
II
Brush my hair
Put on my favourite shirt
And a smart jacket
Splash on some manly scent
I'm ready to go
What woman could resist me?
III
Apparently, every single one
(c) Augustus Stephens - June 2012
Sneezes
You may be sitting comfy
Perhaps preparing for a doze
When this weird kind of pressure
Starts to grow inside your nose
It gradually gets bigger
Till it cannot be withstood
From 'ah' to 'Ah' then 'ah ah'
And then finish with 'AAH..'.
Oh, it's gone
You have to close your eyes or
They'd pop right out your face
And if you hold your nose
You could blow your ears away
Kapaah!
It's just to clear your nostrils
But it's so strong it's just not true
Your lungs are full, your body's tense
As you launch a great 'AAH...'
Where did it go?
Yet some people resist it
They somehow hold it in?
It's such a feeble effort
When they just emit a 'snin'
But me, I give my all
I give it ev'rything I've got
So get out of the way
Or you'll be showering in my snot
So if your nose feels tickly
Then you know what you must do
Don't hold it in, but let it out
Come on ev'ryone 'Ahh CHOOOO'
(c) Augustus Stephens - April 2014
Bath time
I
Fresh out the bubble path
Clean as a daisy
I smell of apple and juniper
II
Brush my hair
Put on my favourite shirt
And a smart jacket
Splash on some manly scent
I'm ready to go
What woman could resist me?
III
Apparently, every single one
(c) Augustus Stephens - June 2012
Sneezes
You may be sitting comfy
Perhaps preparing for a doze
When this weird kind of pressure
Starts to grow inside your nose
It gradually gets bigger
Till it cannot be withstood
From 'ah' to 'Ah' then 'ah ah'
And then finish with 'AAH..'.
Oh, it's gone
You have to close your eyes or
They'd pop right out your face
And if you hold your nose
You could blow your ears away
Kapaah!
It's just to clear your nostrils
But it's so strong it's just not true
Your lungs are full, your body's tense
As you launch a great 'AAH...'
Where did it go?
Yet some people resist it
They somehow hold it in?
It's such a feeble effort
When they just emit a 'snin'
But me, I give my all
I give it ev'rything I've got
So get out of the way
Or you'll be showering in my snot
So if your nose feels tickly
Then you know what you must do
Don't hold it in, but let it out
Come on ev'ryone 'Ahh CHOOOO'
(c) Augustus Stephens - April 2014